Is it just somehting about me... Do i smell bad? I try to shower regualarly. Am i just that freaking oblivious to it that its right there in my face and i dont want to see it. One after another i am told, and told now, for to first time, that it is. I'm just not cut out for this shit am I. I don't want your tired your poor or your sick, i just want... me... What happened to me? I have i lost myself in some childish game. AM I a GAME. Something not to be taken seriously. Something to be toyed with. To be had, and left, and forgotten and left to rot on the side of the street like any other piece of useless shit. Yes thats exactly what i am. My feelings are meaningless, i am worthless, there is no value in me except my will to strive in all i do. I try my best and get whooped in the ass. Nothing i do is ever right. Nothing i do is ever good enough. There is nothing here for me to care for nor cares about me. Shit, there is no meaning for my existance. After several different have pointed out one in the same. I must not question the obvious. There is nothing i can do but wait and wonder... Nothing... Nothing i need to do, except wait and wonder what will happen next, am I to be lost at sea, or am I to be anchored and happy? I can only do so much, and take so much, and hear so much, and see so much, and feel so much... before i snap. I can only take so much abuse, before i break down, only to come back up stronger then before. Take your Blows, i will accept them. Take your anger your rage your passion out on me, there is nothing anymore there is nothing here for anyone. Its not in me to give less the my heart... less the my will, less then all of me. But, it happens sometimes, and although im not god, i expect everyone else to give the same. Nothing more, nothing less, nothing else. Give it your all... thats all i want... ed.... or... still do... i dont know anymore. Im so lost now. I feel like a ship at sea. Offering all i have to god, all i have, all i own, and getting a little breeze in the wrong direction every time...

Help... someone... please... I have two paddles, and only one set of arms...


Random Thought of The Day:

Life Sucks, Life is Harsh, Life is Life