Bored, tired, and just wanted to update. Long day, and need to finish this review... I would love to type but i need to time. Chekc back tomorrow when i have more time if you really are dying to know about my day. And if its killing you so much... ask how it was.


Random Thought of The Day:

What about... a 36 Hour Day.... everyone would die young... and school wouldnt be the majority of your day... yea... i like that.

Everything is better :-D. Mocing on though, I now have a car. The Loser Cruiser is now mine! YES! Pat, my brother, got an SRT-4, the Second fastest car Dodge makes, only second to the Viper. ITs Bad Ass. HE is going to kill it though unless he learns how to drive a stick really fast. But yea, My Life is looking up now. I had a bad week letting people get to me. I think it was beacause of all of the exam reviews and the stress. Moving on though, there is nothing more i would rather be doing right now then sitting with her in my arms... Heh, im really bored right now so i think im going to pay some CS.


Random Thought of The Day:

How long will my car live.... Takings Guesses Now...

What if I were Amish...?

and, to finish making up for missed ones.

Check this.... Glowing Ice Cream.... That would be cool...

Forget Yesterdays post. I don't care what anyone else says anymore. It's my life, I like her and I could care less how she acts (For the most part). I never noticed it until you people pointed it out, and well I sorry now that I do notice it, because I just want things to go back the way they were a week ago or so... Nothing matters anymore, Not what my parents say not what my brother says, not what even my best friends would say, all I care about right now is if she's happy. Now if that equation due to previous evenst has had myself cancelled out... sucks for me, but if not, I would love to keep going there. Easier said then done I know. She has already been through stuff like this, and well... I guess I'm not helping... I'm sorry about that babe. I'm just not good at this stuff I guess. Can you forgive me? Even if you can't, I just want you to know, last night, when you were on stage, the only thing i could think about was you, the only one I saw was you. Sure I noticed everyone else, but, I just kept thinking to myself.... wow.... She's so beautiful. I realize now that I was stupid in letting someone else talk for me. I dont know why i allowed it again... All I know is, if there is anything I can do to make it up to you if it's not too late, I just want to go back and forget what happened, easier said then done agian, but, leave it at what people think as people, and what I think as we. Nothing else should matter, and I realize that now.

Is it just somehting about me... Do i smell bad? I try to shower regualarly. Am i just that freaking oblivious to it that its right there in my face and i dont want to see it. One after another i am told, and told now, for to first time, that it is. I'm just not cut out for this shit am I. I don't want your tired your poor or your sick, i just want... me... What happened to me? I have i lost myself in some childish game. AM I a GAME. Something not to be taken seriously. Something to be toyed with. To be had, and left, and forgotten and left to rot on the side of the street like any other piece of useless shit. Yes thats exactly what i am. My feelings are meaningless, i am worthless, there is no value in me except my will to strive in all i do. I try my best and get whooped in the ass. Nothing i do is ever right. Nothing i do is ever good enough. There is nothing here for me to care for nor cares about me. Shit, there is no meaning for my existance. After several different have pointed out one in the same. I must not question the obvious. There is nothing i can do but wait and wonder... Nothing... Nothing i need to do, except wait and wonder what will happen next, am I to be lost at sea, or am I to be anchored and happy? I can only do so much, and take so much, and hear so much, and see so much, and feel so much... before i snap. I can only take so much abuse, before i break down, only to come back up stronger then before. Take your Blows, i will accept them. Take your anger your rage your passion out on me, there is nothing anymore there is nothing here for anyone. Its not in me to give less the my heart... less the my will, less then all of me. But, it happens sometimes, and although im not god, i expect everyone else to give the same. Nothing more, nothing less, nothing else. Give it your all... thats all i want... ed.... or... still do... i dont know anymore. Im so lost now. I feel like a ship at sea. Offering all i have to god, all i have, all i own, and getting a little breeze in the wrong direction every time...

Help... someone... please... I have two paddles, and only one set of arms...


Random Thought of The Day:

Life Sucks, Life is Harsh, Life is Life

The play i was in was a success. Or i was told. I think i didnt do all that great, but maybe i did. I think the reason why is because the coaches believe it's a team effort in everything and since I am in something with a cast, and i don't feel like i put in my whole enchilada, it wasn't all that great for them. But, i never knew the feeling of having someone you don't even know come pu to you and say "YOu really fit the part, i felt like i was watching the show again from way back when." The best part though, was... the laughs, I felt so good out there every time the people laughed, i couldnt help but smile. I only wish i could have shared that night with someone special, she had a crummy week, and i had other things i had to do. It wasn't my fault i couldn't have been there, but i wish I could have been. Its alright though, or so i think. That girl is Nichole, but yea. I just hope she knows how beautiful she is, and also, that I would trade anything and everything I own to have spent Friday and Saturday with her and her family. Moving on though. A WEEK AND A HALF LEFT OF SCHOOL! *Dances* One week of reviews, then exams... then... NO MORE SPANISH EVER, NO MORE Chem EVER, and no MORE SCHOOL FOR 2 MONTHS!


Random Thought of The Day:

British People Talk Funny....

So whats up yall, i had a crappy day yet again, Freshman suck. They think they will get somewhere by doing the bare minimum... yea not so much in basketball, i work my Arse off everyday, and i get no credit for i, and they do crap and then work hard when we are on the court.... so much crap. But yea, I was stabbed with chopsticks today, during lunch, i was pissed, i honeslty had to constrain myself from decking the little tard who stabbed me... I got up to go to the bakery right, he took my chair, so i was like... excuse me man, and took the chair, and *BAM*... of he was gonna get it... but i just walked away... .Go me. Moving on, I need to finish a project that is late, the end of school and im slacking... whats wrong with me... oh yea.. IM a TEENAGER!, but yea, i need to get into shape for next year. Show is tomorrow yall, it is pretty funny i started laughing on stage, it was bad, but yea, i improv some because i get bored with the lines, so COME SEE IT. Tomorrow, at 7:00 or SAT at 7:00.

(Post Inspired by my Little Sister)

Random Thought of The Day:

If I had a Billion Dollars, I would buy Jamica. If I had 5 I would get ice cream.

The Play is really going.... not so smoothly... I'm sorry i ahd to leave early all of yall, but you know what, honestly I am sorry, but, I dont feel superior, I feel bad. I think though yall would rather have a show though then not have one at all... Just a hunch... I'm an ass... fine, I'm a dipshit... fine... I don't care, i had a shitty day. Nichole, I'm sorry babe... If you need anything just ask, it shall be done. I'm still working on getting you that car ;). Moving on, lets recap... The day started crappy with me realizing i forgot my project, then it got better with me finding out somethings that shocked me, and made me feel bad for someone else... So i tried my had at cheering her up, I don't know how I did, but I hope I helped. Then we moved to basketball where i was landed on by two people and hurt my hip, which is on ice ath the moment, and which i fell on during the show runthrough. I'm sorry, I suck yall... I am the worst at this crap.... Might as well just give it up after this show, if it will make you happy. I'm sorry I didn't stay, I realize i should have, but yea... what ever... you want to yell at me go ahead, lay it one me, just make sure its today, because I don't want to have a crappy day then too... Awsome, my day gets better as i type, I lose the internet... Sweetness... This is going so well today. Others had worse days though... I'm sorry babe... Your beautiful, feel better!


Random Thought of The Day:

Always do what you are afraid to do.
Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882)

Never let your brain get the best of you, he may be smarter then you, but its not your fault he is the brains of the operation... Heh, anywho, Nothing much has happened lately, as you can see, thus i havent updated my blog. Shit happens, but such is life.. AMAT is now WiFi Enabled... kick ass... lol paul and i went war driving and found over a hundred insecure WiFi connections within a 2 - 3 mi radius if that of our house's.. its scary...

Random Thought of The Day:

Why are people allergic to Things?

My frustrations with the world only thicken as the days grow longer with the passion. There is nothing more that i can do. I sit and watch as it all flows past my eyes like a never ending picture, a picture, a movie, captured in motion only by my minds eye. There is nothing i can do to stop, or to change the images that flicker past my face, the only thing i can do is watch and listen and hope to catch a glimpse of the proud and few things that bring me joy in this place. There is nothing here that i truely am in desperate need of at this time, there are a few things i am in intwined with, but none of these aspects will ever leave my side. This mindless babbling is taking away from the time in which i could be participating in mindless work of the average human physc, but there is nothing here holding me to do such, except for my own free will.


Jon is bored, tired, hungry, wanting to see Nichole, doing homework, making a movie, rebuilding a computer, installing software, downloading stuff, playing computer games, and talking on aim... all at.... the same time.... go me...


Random Thought of The Day:

When one hold's so much, is it possible to find a limit to what one wants to hold... or does the will become undying for more?

It's been a while since i last updated, but yea. Nothing much has happend since thurs, lots of play stuff, and such, oh and i did get to see this really beautiful girl again, but yea nothing other then that. I just got finished with a LAN, it was bad ass, and yea. Moving on, im bored so here goes;

The true meaning of something is only defined by what you believe it is, there is nothing in this world with a "universal meaning". If someone doesn't accept it, it is not Universal, because not everyone accepts it. Even if it is construed as right, for the meaning of right, and the meaning of wrong as seen differently in everyones eyes. The true meaning of life is none other then that of which one believes i to be, and as such it is nothing more then a fable to all but the one telling it. With this final stone i emmbed this thought into your head, the only one telling your fable is you, and you alone, and the way it is defined is the way you choose it to be, so take a second, and revise your story, because a good fable, is one with a happy ending.


Random Thought of The Day:

Why is it so many people that go to Creekview are so Stupid? (Noteing a wardriving session experienced by myself and another, Creekview wireless network owners, 5 - 6 have no encryption... with as much money as they have... thats scary...) (Not saying all people are, i know a few who aren't stupid...)